Why do I Wear Long Skirts?

Posted on 10th August 202110th August 2021 by Vicki Goldby

I haven’t had much time for blogging lately, building work has taken over our lives and we are just keeping our heads down until the extension is finished and we can move into the new kitchen. Hopefully the main build will be completed by mid October. We’ve just learnt though that we will be without a kitchen for about a month, during September, so that should be interesting!

Anyway, back to the title of my post, about my propensity to wear long skirts. I’ve been asked the questions a few times and so I thought it time I wrote a post on it. I’ve been wearing longish skirts for over a decade, before that I just wore jeans. You see, one day I was considering Phil’s and my clothes and I realised that we wore exactly the same clothes, jeans and blue tops, the only difference was, mine were smaller! I decided that I would like to look a bit more feminine, but I didn’t have time to put together pretty outfits, so my jeans were swapped for long denim skirts and it’s remained that way since.

I don’t really have any time to consider what I might wear each day, nor am I really bothered, so having a simplified style of dress makes the task of getting dressed extremely fast, which is rather necessary in this house 😁.

I was thinking about my clothes this week because my 2 denim skirts, which I wear in rotation, are either stained or have holes in them, so shopping has been required. Now, how do I find such unfashionable, or should I say vintage clothing?! eBay is my go to. I search in long denim skirt size 10 and within 5 minutes I have 2 skirts, for a total of less than £20, coming my way. They should last me another couple of years. Maybe one day I’ll have time to consider what I wear more carefully, but now definitely isn’t the time.

How do I stay warm in the winter? I wear thermal leggings under my skirt and long brown boots. To be honest I wear thermals nearly all year because I suffer with Raynaud’s and so my core has to stay warm or my fingers and toes go white and start to hurt.

Are skirts practical? I think denim anything is practical and so fabric wise, they’re great. I suspect some people might find they get in the way, but I’ve never been bothered and I appreciate the modesty the extra fabric gives.

The more I’ve worn skirts the more comfortable I feel in them, I have worn shorter skirts and trousers, but rarely. I wear thin trousers for walks in long grass during the summer and I have one shorter skirt I bought in charity shop, but it’s too pretty for every day use.

I’ve put up this post with the awareness that our new revisit TV programme will be out soon (we’ll let you know the date), and people will be busy googling us again with curious questions, so hopefully this will answer one of the commonly asked questions. Many people think that we are Brethens, or Plymouth Brethren’s because I wear a head covering and a long skirt, but hopefully this post explains that it’s not really a faith based decision, just a personal preference.

Hopefully I’ll find some more time to blog over the next few weeks. Does anyone have any posts they’d like to particularly see?

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A House Built with Love

Posted on 31st July 202131st July 2021 by Vicki Goldby

We’ve spent most nights this week pulling wallpaper off the walls in 2 rooms. We have found paper up to 5 layers thick, with plaster on top of paper to pull off. We’re now ready for the plasterer to come next week.

Earlier in the week we cleared out the lounge and the big ‘dorm’ room, which slept 3 boys. We have moved them in with Katie and all their toys and clothes are dispersed into plastic drawers in our bedroom, the bathroom and on the landing. We are basically living in one half of the house whilst the other half is being sorted. The picture above is the lounge where one of our builders has been busy destroying the 1970s fireplace, which we plan to replace with either a log burner if possible, otherwise a somewhat plainer fireplace. Living in a building site with lots of young children is somewhat of a challenge, but stair gates have saved the day and given us a safe space for play.

This is the before and after of our cladding. The wood will turn silver over the next couple of years and it will provide contrast to the main part of the house, and prevents us from having a large white frontage, which would look overwhelming.

Tonight was date night and Phil and I have spent it in our newly created ‘lounge’(our bedroom with a sofa and TV added!). We hope to reclaim the lounge in about a month, once electrics and decorating are done, and the pub style carpet has been replaced.

To be honest, despite the busyness I’m quite enjoying the process. I get to watch the builders at work from my kitchen window each day and constantly stand in awe of their productivity. I feel the need to stand less and work more having watched their daily progress.

I’m also enjoying having less rooms to clean! I would never have chosen to live in a big house, because with a big property comes bigger problems and more work; but this is where God called us and we would never choose to be anywhere else.

Next week will be more electrics, more cladding and more construction work on the internals of the extension. The adventure continues….

Busy Summer Days

Posted on 26th June 202126th June 2021 by Vicki Goldby

I’ve struggled to find time to write over the last few weeks. The garden is blooming and planting out seedlings, weeding, watering and using up the veg has taken up much of my time. The house is being dismantled day by day as the plans for the house are coming to fruition. The builders are here most days and the children have the constant entertainment of diggers and workmen. Katie has the entertainment of dirt heaps and gravel piles. I have the task of keeping her and Sherlock safe from the building site, which they both find hugely interesting.

Jonathan has been undertaking a building project of his own and has built a fantastic play area for the younger children. This area will come into its own once the extension and patio are complete. The play area will be perfectly situated in our newly formed, enclosed back garden, allowing us to eat and drink without fear that a small child will find their way to the ponds.

As there is little I can do to contribute to the building, I have been focusing on decluttering the house in preparation for the internal work taking hold over the main rooms. Phil’s really helped recently, in my pursuit of organisation. My airing cupboard was looking quite messy and it was a job on my list to sort it, Phil must have known because I came in one day to discover the entire contents of the airing cupboard upturned on Katie’s bedroom floor! The bathroom man had needed to access the pipes in the airing cupboard and so my sheets needed moving in a hurry. Anyway, the airing cupboard is looking a lot neater, for now 😉.

Yesterday Phil motivated me to organise the shoes. The builder decided that yesterday was the day to take our hallway to pieces, which required the removal of all shoes and clutter.

The picture on the right shows the fancy 1960s flooring which the builder was very excited to discover. Apparently it suggests that the owners at the time chose something a little bit special. Sadly it’s not really to our taste and we will be replacing with something a bit more modern. I must say though, I prefer it to the 1970s pub carpets which were then put in and still grace our hall to this day.

I came back from our home ed group to a giant pile of shoes to sort through. Today was largely spent organising the shoes, but still, that’s another job done.

*I carried these up to the loft, with the children’s help, where they will be stored until someone grows into them.*

Katie’s growing quickly and that’s freeing me up to do more of the driving to take the children to their activities, as she no longer needs me quite so much and Phil can sometimes do bedtime. Although we have been here quite a while, with lockdowns and a baby, I have left Phil to do much of the driving, leaving me slightly confused as to the location of places. Driving is proving to be a new and interesting experience, because navigating my way around a new area is something I am still adjusting to. I stubbornly don’t use SatNav because I prefer to find my own way, but we also haven’t got round to buying a paper road map, so it is more guess work than accuracy. This is leading to some long, but beautiful drives around the Shropshire countryside 🙂. I think I’m starting to get to grips with the area now, it’s certainly more relaxing getting lost down country lanes, than in the middle of suburbia.

I hope to find time to write a bit more over the next few weeks, but we’ll see how things go. If you want to receive an email when a new post is added, please subscribe to the blog, by clicking on subscribe in the top section of the home page and following the instructions.

Life Lessons from Nature – Weeds

Posted on 13th June 202114th June 2021 by Vicki Goldby

Our garden is chock-full of weeds, nettles, dandelions and numerous other green plants that I don’t want there and seem to be prolific. We have grass that seems to grow more happily in the veg and flower beds than on the lawn and carrots that are fighting for breathe around the weeds that are hiding their leaves.

*Our garden seems to be very fertile*. *Flowers*, *vegetables and herbs grow in abundance*, *but sadly so do weeds! Aspects of our garden are resembling an English jungle, if one could exist!*

Some of the weeds are useful and some are even beautiful but many are just in getting in the way of our vegetables and flowers and taking over the beds!

Last winter we put cow muck on most of the beds and then covered them in black plastic, this really helps with the weeds issue, but we didn’t get round to doing it with every bed. The difference is stark and the uncovered beds now look more like a wildlife garden than a potential home for my potatoes.

*Our pots are growing a selection of flowers and weeds*.

We are trying to keep the garden child and dog safe, and we want our vegetables to grow without chemical residue in the soil and so harsh weed killers are not an option. We have put straw around the strawberries which should help to keep the weeds at bay, and we’re planning on getting bark chips for the flower beds. The berries are peaking their way through the holes we cut in the black plastic, with the hope of depriving the weeds of sunlight. There are still nettles and thistles that have found their way through, but many less than otherwise would have done.

The paths have weeds that grow between the paving slabs, or in between the stones. Every time I go outside, I spot weeds. It’s like dust in the house, it just keeps growing. This is definitely not a tidy National Trust Garden, but maybe I’m setting my sights a bit high!

Our greenhouse has weeds in the borders where the tomatoes are growing. Unfortunately I have a tendency to look at the work still to do, rather on the work we’ve achieved, which leaves me feeling inadequate and somewhat aware of my weaknesses. I really need to accept the weeds and just do my best, I could also do with encouraging the children to help a bit more.

On the plus side, our garden is a haven for wildlife and the bees are having a wonderful time! Even if we find a way to keep on top of the weeds, we plan on always having a wildlife area, which we will leave well alone for the birds and bees to enjoy.

At the moment my yearly dose of Hayfever is putting my gardening on hold and so I am mostly only going out in the cool of the evening. This pause has given me time to reflect on the weeds and how they might relate to the sins in our lives.

The Parable of the Sower has helped me to understand how the ‘weeds’ of sin and worry can hamper my Christian growth, and prevent me from fully revealing the beauty of God in my life. It got me thinking, what are these ‘weeds’, that prevent me from growing fully as a Christian? Each person will have different areas of their life that need to change in order to give God’s Word the maximum space to grow. How can we make our lives more fertile soil to grow God’s Word in our hearts? I think it has to start with prayer, allowing God to convict us of the sins which hold us back from growing fully and then asking for his help to overcome those sins.

We really need to ‘weed’ our lives regularly, just like the flower beds, in order for our lives to truly reflect God in our lives. As I pick my weeds this week, I will be praying for him to help me with my weaknesses.

I love how God speaks through nature. I am beginning to understand a little more why so many of Jesus’ parables were centred around nature. Does God’s creation help you to understand more about Him and to draw closer to Him?

Builders, Broken Toes, Vegetable Gardening and the M25

Posted on 3rd June 20213rd June 2021 by Vicki Goldby

Wow! It’s been a very busy week and thus my lack of posting.

The builders have arrived 😀. Cue noise and chaos!

Our garden is starting to rapidly resemble a building site. The children love watching the builders work and Sherlock loves pinching their sun hats, ear defenders, in fact anything he can pick up! (Dog training advice needed 🙂)

Last week we managed to get a lot of the seedlings in the ground and so our vegetable garden is looking more like a real veg garden, although the weeds are still threatening to take over!

Cabbage, courgettes, pumpkins, sweetcorn, lettuce and spinach. We could almost sound like we know what we’re doing, appearances can be deceptive, the weeds (in all the other beds I didn’t take photos of) tell a very different story 😉.

The next challenge is getting used to going to the garden for our food, rather than the fridge. The lettuces, spinach and herbs are all ready to eat and so we are making the effort to remember to go out and pick the leaves for meals. Spinach isn’t overly popular with some of the children, but hidden in a fruit smoothie they gobble it up, well the younger children do, the older ones are not fooled!

Last weekend we had such a lovely time, we had friends to visit, who stayed in the courtyard, in their camper van. We ate barbecues and sat outside in the evenings sipping wine. With the wisteria growing up the barn walls, the camper van in the courtyard and the balmy evenings, there was a definite French holiday feel about the weekend.

Perhaps the wine was helping us to picture a French gîte? Or maybe the great company just brought back happy memories 😊.

Monday soon came round and I took the children to a gymnastics session. It was a free family fun day and so the whole tribe, minus Christopher, who was working, came along. Jonathan was having a blast and throwing himself (literally) into the activities. Sadly he rather overdid it and threw himself into a springboard and broke 3 toes! Bless him, he’s been very stoical and cheerful throughout, despite it being extremely painful. One of the challenges of living in the country is that it takes 30 minutes to get to the hospital, instead of the 5 minutes it took, when we lived in the town. He’s getting very good at hopping and is not nearly good enough at sitting still, will he ever learn?!

Tuesday was a very different sort of day. A dear friend has recently passed away and so I returned to London for her funeral. It’s the first time I’ve been back down south since we moved here, nearly 2 years ago. The day was full of emotions. I arrived for lunch and enjoyed catching up with a few old friends, what a joy it was to see them! The funeral was the first I’d ever been to that I could actually say had joy woven throughout. Our dear friend loved the Lord with all her heart and walked in faith, service and humility and so we were all full of joy, knowing that she is now resting in the arms of her Saviour. She will be missed hugely, but there was more of a thankfulness for the time God had given us with her, than a sadness of the future without her. We were all privileged to know her.

The journey home was a trip down memory lane, the M25 did its best to remind me of one of the reasons why I love living in the sticks. By the time I’d arrived at Oxford services I was pooped and needed to pause, to gather myself. I’m clearly not very good anymore at handling London traffic, I’ve got used to only being delayed by cows crossing the road and slow tractors 😊.

Yesterday we visited the local lake and made the most of the glorious sunshine. The children swam and built sandcastles, it was the perfect antidote to the M25.

Foraging for Dandelions and Nettles

Posted on 24th May 202124th May 2021 by Vicki Goldby

Our garden is full of weeds at the moment. White fluffy dandelion clocks fill the fields around us, so the fight to keep the grass green, rather than speckled yellow is a futile one. Last week I paid the children a penny per dandelion to pick them. This week I have decided to try a different tack, we are going to try and eat our weeds!

Dandelions are not our only challenge, nettles also grow here in abundance. The chickens and pigs eat most things, but not the nettles! Clumps of these stingers are dotted around the grounds, proudly declaring their ‘inedible by animals’ status.

I have been reading up about these 2 foraging delights, trying to find out more about what God has provided for us here on our land. I was delighted to read about their multiple health benefits, especially the immune boosting properties of dandelions.

*Katie had a lovely time looking for dandelions.*

The challenge now was how to convince the family to eat them. Our children vary in how fussy they are, from ‘brown food is preferrable’, to ‘don’t put it in the bin, I’ll eat it!’ I had no doubts that someone would eat what we make, but it would be great to convince them all.

I found a recipe for Dandelion flower cookies, https://www.splendidtable.org/story/2007/05/12/dandelion-flower-cookies and so we decided to have a go.

*Elizabeth and Hannah pulled the petals off the dandelions.*

*When the children declared that the batter looked like someone had been sick, I wasn’t convinced they would go down very well*!

*We all thought they looked much better cooked.*

So what did everyone think? The younger children all gave them a thumbs up, and even came back for seconds. My sceptical older children were not keen and their reactions were not altogether polite!

I might make them again, but I think I might try dandelion petals in a muffin next time.

I was clearly on a roll and decided that next I had to try out a nettle recipe. With rubber gloves in hand we picked a few nettles and came in to prepare them. I found a recipe for nettle crisps, which sounded the most child friendly recipe I could think of. You basically wash them, coat them in oil, sprinkle on salt and bake for 20 minutes at 150 c.

*This was my second pile of stingers, the first had flowered and only while they were cooking did I discover, from my research, that flowering nettles are bad for you*.

I enthusiastically pulled my crispy looking leaves out of the oven and presented them to my less enthusiastic looking family. I tried them, to show them how delicious they were, and I really did like them, but the children were not convinced. Not one of them liked them 🙁. They said they were furry in your mouth and some simply said they were gross! I happily finished the lot. I definitely didn’t feel stung by them, although my mouth did feel a little tingly afterwards, I’m not entirely sure that was supposed to happen?

We had a lovely time foraging, but I think our children need to stop being so picky if we are going to enjoy God’s free bounty growing here. I think I might need to go back to the drawing board for my next foraging outing. Any suggestions?

We are God’s Masterpiece

Posted on 16th May 202116th May 2021 by Vicki Goldby

Yesterday Phil and Jonathan collected a lathe from a friend at church. Jonathan had been looking to buy one, to add to his workshop, but he had closely missed out on one on eBay and so we continued to pray for one. Then our friend discovered Jonathan wanted one and he happily sold us his, as he had hardly used it.

Immediately upon its arrival, Jonathan set to work. He had decided to, rather ambitiously, make a bowl, as his first project. He worked yesterday evening and all afternoon today and this evening his hard work was complete and he ran in beaming with his finished product.

As he described the process of creating it, the inspiration for my blog post came to me. You see, the bowl was originally one of the branches off our tree. We recently had a tree surgeon over to remove some of the lower branches, so that we had space for our extension, which will start in a couple of weeks. The tree surgeon left many pieces of wood for Jonathan, to make wooden items with, as well as piles of logs for us to season, to use in our log burner.

Seeing the bowl reminded me of the Bible verse, ‘For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.’ Ephesians 2:10. This bowl was Jonathan’s ‘masterpiece’, but it reminded me of God creating us as his masterpiece. Jonathan took a dead piece of wood and started to work on it, he had to take off the rough exterior, to reveal the beautiful wood underneath. When we first come to Christ there begins a process of removing our ‘rough exterior’, our old way of living. He also showed me the heart of the wood in the dip of the bowl. This struck me as a reminder that God has put his heart in each of us, but we need shaping to reveal the beauty of God’s heart in us.

The wood contained some beautiful knots, which Jonathan had to work on more carefully than the rest of the bowl. Each knot was delicate and required care and attention to bring out their beauty without damaging them. How many ‘knots’ do we have in our lives? ‘Knots’ made from our challenges, our pain, our suffering. These ‘knots’ are worked on by God, our Master Craftsman. He treats us so gently when we have a ‘knot’ in our lives and yet he uses each ‘knot’ to make us more beautiful, more Christlike. Each bowl made from wood is unique, some with more knots than others, but all beautiful. We too are made into something beautiful when we give our lives into the hands of the Master Craftsman.

Finally, I placed the fruit in the bowl and God used this to give me one last reminder. His work in us is for a purpose, we are created to do ‘good things’. A bowl is not much use unless you put something in it and we too are created for God’s purposes. The fruit was also a helpful picture of the Holy Spirit working in us. It is the fruit of the Spirit in us which enables us to do the good work God has given us to do.

Isn’t it amazing how God takes someone who was once dead (in his/her sins) and by putting his heart in them and by the fruit of his Holy Spirit, he creates someone beautiful and reveals to them their created purpose.

‘God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved.’ Ephesians 4-5

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What have we been up to today?

Posted on 11th May 202111th May 2021 by Vicki Goldby

After glorious sunshine this lunchtime, this afternoon brought several hours of terrestrial rain and hail. Our drainage system struggled to hold onto the water and the courtyard became increasingly flooded.

At 7pm Phil came in from an evening work meeting. I had hoped for a pair of hands cleaning up the kitchen, but a rather larger problem was needing his attention outside. As he’d left the office in the hayloft, he had been greeted by a newly forming lake in our courtyard. He immediately donned his wellies, waterproof gloves and heavy duty gloves and grabbing the extendable plunger went forth in battle against the elements.

This was at the midpoint of his clearing up.

He quickly realised that he would need to get his whole arm down the drain. He found a wire crate to settle upon, to prevent his entire body getting soaked and equally from preventing any excess water from finding its way to the drain. He soon discovered that this particular drain was not the only problem and thus sought out the source of the blockage. After gazing down our septic tank and 2 other drains, he discovered where the blockage appeared to be. Then came out his trusty extendable plunger, which he worked with for over an hour, to finally release the water which was backing up quite significantly.

Finally the water started flowing freely.

This is not an uncommon type of task around this place. With bigger properties you get bigger problems! Old houses, animals and barns bring along many caretaker jobs. I always feel blessed to have a handy husband who is not afraid to get dirty.

Once the job was done he came in for a much needed shower and we had a slightly later than planned ‘at home date night’, with garlic chicken and sweet potato fries, yum!

What’s my day been like? Much less messy, and actually quite productive. I recently realised that my children did not know all the Ten Commandments, and I thought it was one of those things I should have taught them. So I came up with a plan to help them remember.

First we listened to this song https://youtu.be/OSXviJco41k over and over, whilst dancing away, in a slightly Greek wedding way! Once we had the song firmly stuck in our heads, Elizabeth found some pictures on the internet for us to colour, cut out and rearrange in the right order.

Once they had the Commandments memorised they had 1 Haribo and after cutting and sticking they got another 2. We will continue to practice them for the rest of the week and keep singing the song. Tonight I will go to sleep with the song dancing round my head, I wonder what my dreams will entail?!

Our Grace Based Marriage

Posted on 10th May 202110th May 2021 by Vicki Goldby

This summer we will have been married 20 years. That feels a pretty significant milestone and one which has given me cause to reflect on all that makes our marriage such a happy one. I am convinced that grace is key to our joy filled marriage and helps us to see the best in one another.

Let me share with you a couple of examples from our marriage of when grace has been shown to one another, instead of grumbling and complaining.

I am not in any way shape or form an early bird. Mornings for me start reluctantly, and are best started late, or at the very least, slowly. Conversations with me before 8am are likely to be short, incoherent and not always filled with grace! Phil on the other hand is great in a morning, jolly and fully functional upon waking. I always admire his ability to move, when my body feels immobilised by the call of sleep and a warm snuggly duvet. Now the grace part, in this scenario, comes entirely from Phil. He knows the challenges I have with early starts and he graciously leaves me to slumber, often giving the other early risers some breakfast, to buy me a few more minutes rest. Every day I am grateful for this gift.

For over a decade, in the early days of parenting, I woke early with little ones, who seemed to believe that sleep was for the weak, whilst Phil left early to commute up to London. Those were often challenging days, and there were not a few tears shed on days when I just felt so tired due to waking at 5 am with a newborn, only to get them back to sleep just before the toddler woke for the day.

Thankfully Phil has been working from home for about 7 years and is invariably the first one up each day. He is so gracious though, because he never complains, he just happily accepts that I am a happier wife if I wake up later. If he were to hassle me to get up, I would reluctantly move, but he loves me too much to ask that of me, unless there is a particular reason.

In turn I offer Phil grace in the evenings. By six o’clock Phil’s patience is dwindling and I know he will need a break, especially as the noise level in our house crescendos somewhere around teatime. Rather than asking him to push on through, I try and take some of the pressure off, by taking on the bulk of the bedtime routine.

I’m no saint though, and I don’t always feel gracious because irritation and impatience are part of our humanity, but by looking to God instead of at the situation, he pours his love and grace into me and enables me to be kind instead of sharp.

Grace is an everyday feature in our busy lives and gives us the ability to see the situation from a different angle. For example, each day I stack the dishwasher and then Phil comes in and looks at my deeply flawed stacked dishwasher, he often graciously walks away, closing his eyes to my absolute failings in terms of fitting in the maximum number of items in the most appropriate places! Sometimes he just can’t resist restacking it though. I watch as the dishwasher, which I stacked in a hurry, but to the best of my ability, with Katie trying to get in the dishwasher and sit on the dishwasher door, is unloaded and then reloaded with meticulous precision. My pride at that point can feel wounded, because I tried and he is undoing all my work, or I can show grace and thank Phil for helping me to clean up the kitchen. My prideful response would begin to build a wall between us but my gracious response would build a bridge.

Grace starts with prayer. First we accept our need of grace from God. It is his grace, his free gift of eternal life, for us who are lost, broken and undeserving, which enables us to be gracious to those around us.

Motherhood and marriage, often challenging and hard work and both needing bags of grace.

What do you think makes a happy marriage? I’d love to hear your responses in the comments.

From One Child to Nine, Our Journey in Pictures

Posted on 6th May 20217th May 2021 by Vicki Goldby

We never imagined we would ever be parents of nine children. We thought maybe two or three, but God touched our hearts and asked us to trust him. Here is a little glimpse into how the last 18 years has looked.