Author: Vicki Goldby

Learning to laugh

Posted on by Vicki Goldby

You’d have thought, after my last post, https://www.lifeinallitsfullness.blog/uncategorized/what-mothers-day-means-to-me/ today might have been quite emotionally draining. I think in a way though, writing down my memories yesterday released the emotions that would otherwise have leaked out today. Instead, God has given me a renewed sense of joy.

God spoke to my heart so clearly today, during our family worship time. Firstly we read some of Proverbs 31, when it says, ‘She is clothed with strength and dignity and can laugh at the days to come.’ Do we laugh at the days to come? It almost feels disrespectful to laugh at the moment, but I think God is calling his children to live with joy, not fear. and the physical outlet of joy is laughter. I think many of us may fear the days to come, but this is not how it needs to be.

Dignity is the other character quality mentioned here. According to Strong’s concordance, it means honour and glory. We are clothed with this glory when we look up at Christ and we don’t focus our thoughts too much on the things of the world. This is something I am learning every day. The news pushed out by the media is ever shocking and quick to change, almost addictive in nature, it can consume my thoughts and steal my joy.

Clothing is often used, in the Bible, to help us to understand a Biblical concept, for example, we are clothed in Christ’s righteousness and we are clothed in his armour. The clothing that this verse speaks of Proverbs 31, is strength, the inner strength of a heart yielded to God’s plans. We are not strong when we lean on our own understanding and our own plans, or when we see only what the world sees. Our strength comes instead when we look to Christ and live in the strength he gives us, by his Holy Spirit.

Thankfully, God knows my weaknesses though and today spoke to my heart, he reminded me that the days ahead may be turbulent, but as God’s children, clothed in his strength and glory, we can not just let go of fear for the future, as we turn to him, we can laugh at the days to come.

As our family service went on, God continued to help me to understand how he wants me to live in these days. One of the songs we sang today was ‘My Lighthouse’. Again God ministered deeply to my soul through this song. The words, ‘I won’t fear what tomorrow brings,’ stood out clearly as words for me to take seriously. Will we fear for the future, or will we trust that, as the song goes on to say, ‘my God’s love will lead me through, you are the peace in my troubled sea’? We are living in such troubled times and yet God is still holding us, guiding us and reminding us not to fear.

Don’t you love it when you know God has spoken to your heart? He is so kind and will continue, if we seek him, to lead us through these days without fear and with the peace of trusting in him and his good plans for us.

What Mother’s Day means to me…

Posted on by Vicki Goldby
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Joy and heartbreak in equal measure. A reminder of what I have a gained and what I have lost. A day with with much laughter, but a day clothed in an underlayer of grief and loss.

I am a mother, but I lost my mother. So many of us have lost so much this year. So much time with family, so many opportunities to relive past grief. Mother’s Day is for me, another of those days.

I have so much to thank God for as a mother. He made me a mother and blessed me 9 times, 9 lives entrusted to our care, 9 lives to pray for, 9 children to hold and nourish, 9 pregnancies and births in which to learn to lean on the Lord and to trust him completely.

I am who I am because I am a mother. I am who I am because I lost my mother as a child. Childhood grief has shaped me. After losing Mum I put a wall up to protect myself from hurt, then Phil came along and brick by brick it came down and then with each child God has opened my heart up to love, receiving his love and his gifts.

Grief never ends, but God brings comfort in the grief. We can get lost in grief, but when we turn to the Light, he guides our path through the darkness of grief. Losing my mother has left a hole, one that God has filled many times over the years with mothers. Older women have often mentored me and filled that role that was missing in my life.

The last year has for all of us been hard, in different ways. For me I have realised that that hole still exists and that with the lack of family and church contact it has remained empty. Each day I wake knowing that there is an empty part of me. Some days I am so busy I can forget, but when I need that comfort, that comfort I needed as a teenager without a mum, the comfort of being cared for, I long for her arms.

These are the last 2 photos I can find of Mum and me. They were taken the summer before she passed away.

I know in many ways I long for that which may not even have existed if she was here today. As adults we relate differently to our parents, but I never knew what that relationship with Mum would look like; and so in times of loss, I tend, temporarily, to revert back to the lost child that I was, looking for someone to hold me.

God in his great mercy gave me Phil, my safe place. His arms have held me when I’ve sobbed. As a young girl, after Mum’s death I couldn’t cry, as I didn’t feel safe to let go, as Dad was grieving too. Now I do feel safe and I can let go and I know that Phil will support me completely.

More merciful still was God’s gift of himself to me. His love for me carries me each day. I pour out love, as a mother and wife each day, as God pours his love into me.

God chose this path for me and he knew it would hurt. I’m ok with that. This path has led me to him, to Phil and to being a mother, I could never want for more. I know my mum would delight to see the life I have and the grandchildren she has. One day they will all play together in Heaven, until then I will tell them stories of Nana Chris and how she hugged me and loved me. I will tell them I miss her but that God understands what it means to grieve. For when Lazarus died, ‘ Jesus wept.’

My Mum was an English teacher and could write poetry. I remember her helping me with writing an ‘Animal Farm’ poem for English a year before she died, I say help, but I think it was largely her skill on display! Anyway I remember it was good and the teacher asked me to read it out to the class. She also always wanted to write a book. So I know when I write, a little of my Mum lives on in me.

So for Mum on Mothers’ Day….

I watched you slowly slip away,
Your lips were turning blue,
You had no strength to carry on,
Your time on earth was through.

For years you’d fought the battle,
In your body and your mind,
As cancer took its grip on you,
And peace you couldn’t find.

The fear was all-consuming,
The pain filled every hour,
Your fear was for the future,
Over it you had no power.

I cuddled you in bed at night,
We talked about your fear,
You asked me if I thought you’d die,
Something no child wants to hear.

You told me that you loved me,
The last words I heard you say,
They’re imprinted on my memory,
I can hear them to this day.

Childhood abruptly ended,
As I stoically marched on,
The cuddles in your bed at night,
Would be forever gone.

School exams, they came and went,
I faced them without you,
My driving test, first day at work,
I needed you then too.

You never met my husband,
Never saw my wedding day,
Never met my children,
Never watched them play.

I wonder what it’s like,
To have a mum who you can phone,
To tell her all your problems,
Even after you’ve left home.

But there never was a moment,
That Jesus didn’t see,
As I tried to hold the pain inside,
He was holding me.

He knows I lost my mother,
He too wept for my loss,
I began my healing journey,
When I understood the cross.

Our Home Library

Posted on by Vicki Goldby
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The children have been working hard on sorting the books this week. They found the promise of crisps (which we rarely have), once the job was done, very motivating

😉

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This is what our shelves looked like before the children got to work on them. We’ve got 5 more shelves like this which the children have been organising this week.

As home educators, reading has always been top of our priority list. From babyhood all the children have loved flicking through board books, as they grew I would read to them, every evening and often multiple times during the day. I would find that when all was going crazy, a quiet story would change the mood of the house, and give me 5 minutes to sit still 😉.

As they’ve grown, they’ve continued to love reading to themselves. We’ve kept the children interested in reading in a couple of specific ways. One has been acquiring interest based books. For example, Jonathan and Christopher always loved action, adventure and spy books. Thankfully Matthew has followed suit and so we have been able to pass their books onto him. Madeleine loves horses and so we’ve gone through just about every horse book we could get our hands on. Likewise with Elizabeth and gymnastic books. Hannah adores animals and thankfully animal books are easy to find and we already had a lot, so she’s sorted. The younger children are not very fussy and will settle down to listen to whatever I suggest. Another way we have encouraged reading is that we have give the children limited screen time, which I think is more appealing than books for most children. Without screens they reach out for books to occupy their minds.

How did we get so many books without breaking the bank? I am a very keen bargain hunter and during our years in Surrey I went to the Scout and Guide Jumble sale 4 times a year, as well as the huge local annual book fair. I have picked up most of our books for about 30p each. Of course we have bought some new, but we try where possible to get them second hand off the web. We have also inherited a lot of books from friends and family who have passed them on.

Before moving, we used to make full use our local library. We would order them on line and then go down and collect a pile every week. Since we moved and are thus not so near to the library, and then since the lockdowns as well, we have decided to continue to build up our home library.

As well as specific interest books, we have a large number of information books, Christian biographies, Christian fiction, Children’s Bibles and Bible stories and an assortment of other varied reading matter.

My personal favourite books to read aloud have been the ‘Little House Books’, ‘Little Pilgrim’s Progress’, almost any Patricia St John books, ‘Ten Peas in a Pod’ by Arnold Pent and the Little Lights series of Christian biographies.

What do you like to read with your children, or what memories do you have of favourite childhood books?

Do come back here soon, as I will do a post in the next few days about will how we teach our children to read.

24 Hours is Enough

Posted on by Vicki Goldby

Sometimes when I look around at all I have to do, I get so overwhelmed. Everyday there are needs to be met and often they come at me simultaneously. Meals to be cooked, animals to be cared for, rooms to be cleaned, children to be read with and taught, washing to be done, squabbles to be sorted and on and on. Some days I just want to hide! When you add onto that the state of the world we are living in, it really can get on top of me. Recently I’ve been feeling like that, and I sought God for an answer. As I turned in my Bible, He led me to this verse, ‘Now I will take the load from your shoulders; I will free your hands from their heavy tasks.’ Psalm 81:6. Wow! That’s exactly what I need, but how would God do that? The tasks still need doing. I continued to seek after him and I began to understand what he was calling me to do. I wrote the following poem during my time of calling on him, as a way to work through the questions and seek the answers.

24 HOURS IS ENOUGH

I just need more time,
I have so many tasks,
With just 24 hours,
It’s too much to ask.

This job overwhelms me,
As I look at it all,
Can I please have more time,
To juggle these balls?

I see all around me,
So much I must do,
I can’t find the time,
To see each job through.

I believe it is time,
To stop and reflect,
To pause all my rushing,
To ask what God expects.

He asks me to listen,
And sit at his feet,
He’ll then give me time,
For my tasks to complete.

The hours that we’re given,
Are enough for each day,
To fulfil what God asks,
If we remember to pray.

These words ministered to my soul and gave me cause for pause. I really do feel lighter today, like the worries of the world and for our children’s future do not rest on my shoulders (I knew they didn’t, but I needed reminding). The tasks here, on our smallholding and with our family, are just as big as ever, but appear smaller once I look to our great God. I have remembered that each hour is also better spent when I have begun it with a prayer. I am gradually learning, but God knows how easily I am distracted and how quickly I forget. Thankfully he NEVER gives up on us and continues to call us back to rest in him.

The story of Mary and Martha is a good example of this Biblical principle in practice. I pray I will learn to be a Mary and not a Martha.

‘As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!”. “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” Luke 10 38-42

I must confess….

Posted on by Vicki Goldby

When we moved here I dreamt of children working hard on the land. Cleaning out and feeding the animals, digging the ground and thoroughly immersing themselves in our smallholding. Has this happened? Yes, in most ways. They do take the scraps to the animals, collect the eggs, change the animals’ water and sometimes help with the gardening. In other ways life is not always roses around the door.

Let me share with you an example. For the first year of having chickens, the children took it in turns to clean them out. To start with they did a fantastic job, but over time I noticed the job wasn’t being done quite so well, or with quite the same enthusiasm. I felt that our lady layers deserved a bit more time being spent on them. So I volunteered to be the number one chicken cleaner.

Now I come to the confession. I feel that I’m supposed to be retraining the children to do the job properly, but I don’t want to give the job back! You see every afternoon around 4pm my older children give me a welcome 20 minutes of brain space. They care for their younger siblings and I get ‘chicken therapy’. I spend 20 minutes picking poo out of their hen houses and run and I feed my grateful girls (they’re not even picky eaters 😉). This is often the only quiet time I get all day and I love it. These lovely layers don’t whinge at me, they don’t ask me questions, they don’t tell me they’re bored, they don’t ask what they can eat next and they don’t even complain about their siblings. It’s bliss!

My love for such mundane tasks goes back a long way, to my turbulent teenage years. I remember the day after Mum died, it was right at the beginning of my year 10 summer holidays, and I wondered how I would fill the days ahead of me. My instinctive thought was to work, so I opened up the Yellow Pages (yes I’m that old) and phoned round all the local catteries and kennels, looking for a holiday and weekend job. Thankfully I found someone willing to take on a 14 year old and my cleaning therapy began. As I plodded through my daily tasks I had brain space, time to begin to process all that I was going through. I found the mundane routine entirely comforting, something predictable in a world turned upside down.

Now again, I feel as if life has been turned upside down, I’m sure many others feel the same. For me the memories of losing Mum have been relived as I have lost time with family and connections with those I love. The pain of loss and the uncertainty of the future has once again been brought to the fore. So I return to my animals, to my cleaning, to my mundane silent work. In the silence, my head can think and I can begin to process the changes in the world.

Maybe when lockdown ends and life gets busy again I will retrain my little helpers, but for now I need my daily dose of chicken therapy. A mum in lockdown with 9 children has got to find a way to carve out a moment to herself! ‘I’m cleaning out the chickens’ has become the perfect excuse to have my much needed time and space 😉.

 

Sharing our Faith with our Children

Posted on by Vicki Goldby

I was asked by one of our readers to share a little about how we raise our children to know the Lord Jesus. I need to be completely honest. I know that nothing I say will guarantee that anybody’s children, including my own will choose to follow Jesus. I often say that my children can’t piggy back their way to Heaven on my faith. We can tell them who Jesus is, we can model a living relationship with Christ, we can read the Bible daily, but we cannot do the work of the Holy Spirit. Only God, by His grace can save our children, but as parents we have the task of teaching His ways and nurturing their relationship with their Saviour.

Practically speaking, what have we done to help our children to know Jesus? Let me preface this by saying that we are far from perfect, but we do worship our perfect God and He says that we can take anything to Him in prayer. Wow, what a privilege! We have a free entry into the throne room of the most high God and we can speak to Him and petition Him for the needs of our children. The most important thing we have ever done for our children is to pray for them. From before conception I, as the family’s prayer warrior, (well I do like to take every opportunity to talk!) have prayed for our children. I have prayed that they will know their Saviour, that they would love Him and serve Him every day of their lives.

I know that children who love the Lord will have a positive impact on this world and they will have a joy filled life, as well as eternal security and this drives my prayers. Their lives will not always be easy, but they will know the peace and joy that comes with following the One who loves them so much that He gave His life for them.

We continue to pray for them daily throughout their lives, by their beds each night when they are small, or as they grow older when we say goodnight, and every time there is a hurdle in their lives. If they come to me with a problem, the first thing I will often do is pray. Each night before bed, Phil and I pray together (Phil sometimes mumbles between snores if we hit the wrong side of midnight 😉). It is at this time that we will bring our children before the Lord together and ask for His help in their lives.

Arrow prayers during the day, when the children are driving me nuts, help to bring peace where there is conflict and wisdom where there is confusion. Asking the Lord for help with every situation saves us time and enables us to help our children handle everything that comes their way. It doesn’t guarantee that at least once a day I won’t need to hide in the utility room with chocolate though! These kind of prayers also demonstrate to the children the best way to handle any problem. If we pray before we act, things always go better.

We also read the Bible with our children. Once a day, normally at the evening meal, we read the Bible to our children. This post explains more about how we do this. https://www.lifeinallitsfullness.blog/uncategorized/goldby-food/

We encourage the children to read the Bible on their own, preferably before their day begins, but this is more of a goal than a reality. Like the rest of us, they are still growing in self discipline, and often prefer sleep to Bible reading! We don’t force it, we just encourage and leave the Holy Spirit to do the rest. If anyone has any suggestions to encourage this I’d love to hear them.

Each home ed child, in our family, receives Postal Bible School every month. I LOVE PBS. They send out free age appropriate Bible worksheets each month, to anyone who registers. It teaches them the Bible, it’s free and it’s fun. The worksheets drop through our door once a month, what child doesn’t love receiving post? I just need to get more organised to not lose any sheets and get them all back on time (tidiness and order are not my strengths). Anyway, the children are each designated a specific person to mark their work and the last month’s sheets are always returned with lovely comments and points earned. Every six months there is a prize sheet from which the children choose prizes from. What’s not to love?! Here is the link, if you want to register. https://postalbibleschool.com/

During the lockdowns we have worshipped as a family or in the park with other Christians. Sometimes the children complain about joining in, as without friends it is harder to be motivated, but we just encourage, we don’t make them. Showing the children that worshipping God is something we believe is essential even when church is shut, demonstrates to them much more than telling them ever could.

I would say that the old adage of ‘more is taught than caught’ applies to this subject. Our faith is everything to Phil and I, although it is lived out imperfectly. We try not to make decisions without first praying and when we read the news we consider it from a Biblical perspective. When people contact us with problems we pray for them, often on the phone and the children hear those conversations (privacy is my dream, not my reality!). We take our children with us when we help neighbours, or when we attend evangelism events and so for them this is a natural way to live. By nature, Phil and I would often rather do things without the children, because it is often easier, but home education means we are almost never alone during the day, but the bonus of that is that the children see our lives of faith lived out. The children see our failings, and there are many of them, but they also see us asking God to help us with them. If children see a life lived in Christ and the joy that brings, that will encourage within them a desire to seek this way of life for themselves.

We don’t shield our children from the events in the world, on the contrary, we want them to make a difference in this world and so they need to understand people and understand world events, but all through the lens of faith. We want them to have compassion on everyone and so we try to show compassion. We want them to love God and so we try to show them how much we love God. It’s all about seeking first the kingdom of God for ourselves and trusting that He will help us with all other things, including giving us all the wisdom we need to raise our children and to point them to Jesus.

We do our best to bring our children up in faith, but we know that it is God which does all the work. He helps us to parent when we struggle with patience, when our children don’t treat each other kindly, when we just want to give up because attitudes are sharp and angry. If it was down to us then our children would be lost, but thankfully God works through our small efforts. It’s a good job, because some days we’re completely hopeless!

P.S. We have figured out how to add a share button to the posts now, so please do share any posts you feel would bless others.

Our House has had a Nose Job!

Posted on by Vicki Goldby

When we first saw our home we fell in love with it. It was not its beauty that drew us in though, but a calling, a vision, a sense of ‘knowing’ that this was where we should live. We have always loved the plot and location, but we knew that the house needed some TLC.

TLC would be a mild description of the complete overhaul required to make our house the home we dream of, but until then, home is where the heart is, and our heart is here. I somehow love the anaglypta wallpaper and the pub carpets. Upstairs in particular reminds me of a 1970s B and B, with its bedrooms off corridors and landing bathrooms. When we do start to renovate I think I’ll miss the drinks cabinet left here, which is reminiscent of something Margo and Jerry might have had in ‘The Good Life’, but it won’t fit in in the room my imagination is picturing.

The house has numerous projects needed which we are now beginning to work on. The first one began this week. Our house has had a nose job!

The all important ‘before’ shot.

All week long three great window fitters and our fab builder have destroyed and rebuilt part of our home. Nearly all the windows have been removed and refitted and the pointed section in middle of the front of the house (which was a design feature added in the 1960s) removed.

There is of course inevitably some scarring, but when the whole house is rerendered in the summertime it will look like it was never there.

We’re going by the theory that things often look worse before they look better. We can see the potential though and it’s very exciting!

We are already feeling the benefits of the new windows. As I stand next to them the whistling wind doesn’t come through and make me shiver. They also all shut and lock, how exciting is that!

Now we’ve begun, we are all full of enthusiasm to see this lovely old farmhouse being given a new lease of life. We’re aiming to hold onto the best of the original features of the house, whilst updating it to make it run in a more energy efficient way. Onward and upward, we’re now making plans for phase 2….bathrooms…we’ll keep you posted 🙂.

For all parents stressed out by Home Ed

Posted on by Vicki Goldby

This is for all parents who are currently ready to tear their hair out with children at home all day and struggling with home schooling.

I wrote this poem 10 years ago when I had little experience home educating and 4 children 7 and under, and no big children to help me. Some days still feel like this, but now I know that they pass and that I learn to be more patient through every trial I go through.

REMEMBER TO PRAY

I feel the fight,
From the start of the day,
I don’t want to get up,
I try to delay.

Then the children descend,
In great one big heap,
It’s not fair I cry,
I just want to sleep.

I feel in my soul,
There’s a battle within,
And prayer is my weapon,
With which God can win.

The battle continues,
As schoolwork commences,
My son has a strop,
He puts up his defences.

‘I don’t like this work,
I won’t do it today,
This is too hard,’
I hear him say.

I know he can do it,
It’s just so frustrating ,
What more can I try,
To be motivating?

Every day I wish he’d,
Work on his own,
But he just isn’t ready,
To do it alone.

So once I accept,
He wants me by his side,
My frustration and anger,
Begin to subside.

A new challenge arises,
As toddlers unite,
They’ve been making a mess,
I’m not up for the fight.

There’s dolls, clothes and puzzles,
There’s pens, books and toys,
I can’t hear myself think,
Above the noise.

So I call out to Jesus,
Turn frustration to prayer,
And the day turns around,
As He carries my cares.

So tomorrow I’ll learn,
And remember to pray,
For the strength and the patience,
To do it God’s way.

Cosy Winter Nights

Posted on by Vicki Goldby
Our favourite winter read has taken on a new relevance this year.

One routine for which I am truly grateful is our evening story time. At about 8pm every evening, once the littlest two are in bed, we settle down in front of the log burner to soak ourselves into the world of this nineteenth century family, as they seek to survive during the coldest winter they had known.

I first read this book to our oldest two sons about eight years ago and it has found a firm place in our winter reading library. This year the story spoke to us, in our current situation, as we read of Pa, Ma, Laura, Mary, Carrie and little Grace, trapped in their homes, with school cancelled and little to do each day. Our grumblings are daily put in check as we read of frozen ceiling nails, needing to eat only twice a day due to lack of food and a lack of heat and light.

We are very grateful, on these cold winter nights to have a cosy place to read and cuddle by. We have recently added a safety gate around the log burner, to protect little fingers.

I have found myself wondering from time to time what Ma and Pa would make of our current situation. I have laughed as I have thought how ridiculous they would find smart phones and all day distractions from technology. Pa was quite sceptical of progress, he thought it made you dependent on others. He probably had a point. As our family seeks to be more self sufficient, we are daily reminded of how much we do not know and how many skills have been lost to ‘progress.’

We are trying to embrace the best of the new, with ground source heating, insulation, electric milker and washing machine, to name a few items which are hugely helpful. We are also seeking to rediscover some ‘old ways.’ We hope to find a slower pace of life, a life based around the rhythms of nature, seasons, sunrise and sunset. We have already begun this journey and already, we are feeling the benefits of this simpler life.

I recently had a Bible verse brought to mind, one that in many ways reminds us of what we are working towards. ‘This is what the LORD says: “Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls.’ Jeremiah 6:16. We often find, in the busyness of our modern life, it is harder to find time to stop and hear God’s voice, but when we follow the ancient paths, the ways of our forefathers, we stop our rushing, we put down our technological distractions and we take time to listen to him.

Some days my soul does not feel at rest, some days are just hard. On those days, if I step outside and start to work with my hands, I feel my shoulders drop, my jaw release, my mind clear and I start to see why we must pursue this goal with ever greater zeal. As the world ‘progresses’ ever faster, we are seeking after the ‘ancient paths’, there we will find rest for our souls.

Keeping Little Hands Out of Mischief

Posted on by Vicki Goldby

When I saw this photo my eyes were drawn to the children playing happily, but then I looked beyond at the dishes cluttering the side 😯. All I can say is that I thank God daily for my dishwasher!

Phil walked into the kitchen one day earlier this week, he snapped the above photo, he wanted to capture this moment whilst our younger children were all peacefully working together.

You see our house isn’t always harmonious, the day is punctuated with emotions, some joy felt and some portraying the hurt feelings bubbling over. Sometimes one sibling has frustrated another and often I pause to handle another dispute. Phil suggested I could finish my career working for the UN in a peace keeping position, as I have gained much practice in this discipline!

On this particular day though I had discovered the playdough which had been hidden at the back of the fridge and pulled out the shapes and cutters. Hours later, the children were still busy making ‘biscuits’ and other baked delights for their ‘shop’. The peace this new distraction brought was a welcome relief after the persistent requests of, ‘Mummy, what can I do next?’ I have often found the best way to keep children interested in toys is to hide them for a while, then when they are pulled out the novelty gives them a new lease of life; I hadn’t intentionally hidden the playdough though, it had just got buried beneath the other fridge items(my less than perfect housewife skills can sometimes swing in my favour 😉.)

I have that the found the intensity of lockdown life has been quite challenging. Although we have much to do here, the children still look to me as their entertainment director. Not a day goes by when I am not asked what we are doing, what’s for meals and what our plans are for tomorrow. This is often a guilt ridden experience as I realise that I have nothing new and exciting planned, but it drives me to creativity.

As home educators, our life was once filled with groups and clubs, but now the days blend and the only structure to our days is family church on a Sunday. We are trying to add in new activities for each day. So far we have gardening on a Friday and shopping on a Saturday, with the park on a Sunday afternoon. This still leaves me on a Monday wondering how I will fill the next four days and ring the changes to prevent lockdown boredom sinking in.

With the weather having improved this week we have been outside more and I have enjoyed watching the new buds appearing on the trees. As each new bud springs forth I am filled with a renewed hope that all things change and this is just a season.

I have been seeking this week to make the most of this season, to get our home in order. We hope, God willing, to have friends to stay in the Haybarn this summer and so I am working hard to get the house and garden in a better shape for any visitors. Doing anything with little ones is slow though, they do so love to ‘help’! With nowhere else to go though I am in no hurry, so I am learning to slow down and see the world with the same wonder as the smallest children, cherishing everything as a new discovery. Nature isn’t the only thing to bring them wonder though. The contents of our cupboards, unrolling toilet rolls and emptying cereal boxes seem to provide little ones with equal excitement, when my back is turned! Mummy finds the clearing up slightly less entertaining though🧹😬.

Maybe next week I’ll get something done, something solid I can tick off my list, something that goes beyond the daily tasks. Or maybe I will learn to just enjoy the day and be grateful for this calmer season with less activities to distract us and cause us to rush around. This season will pass, but God is using this season, these quieter days, to prepare us, in all ways, for the days ahead.